Scooby Doo and the Super Collider

To my left is my trusty sidekick. She sleeps. Deeply. There’s a slight snore coming from her direction and one foot paws the air in slow motion as if she were running on clouds.

To my right is someone else’s trusty sidekick. She sleeps like Jason Bourne. One eye open. I could tell this morning by the periodic twitch of her brow that she was prepared to elude vicious CIA assassins even before her first Snausage.

One is salt and a tiny bit of pepper.

The other is pepper and a little bit of salt.

One only breaks the silence when she needs to go outside or someone is too slow with the treats. The other takes it upon herself to loudly announce the presence of random reflected light on the walls and ceilings.

One of them understands and performs more commands than my children. The other often fails to recognize her own name.

The kids are in awe of this new playmate and we adults are frozen with fear that she’ll lose IQ points in the ten days or so she’ll be living here. The pressure is intense.

Smart dogs are a lot of work. Less smart dogs are more our comfort level. (I refuse to call Charlie dumb simply because she doesn’t high-five us on command. Most people aren’t high-fiving these days, you know.) Charlie doesn’t require entertainment. She doesn’t stare meaningfully into our eyes like we’re too dumb to realize Timmy’s fallen down the well again, and she certainly doesn’t poop on command. If I had to remember to command everyone to poop daily our family would be a Gastroenterologist’s dream.

Side Note: The beauty of the 21st Century is exemplified by the fact that I just Googled “Poop Doctor” so I could use the appropriate title and this came up. Before Google I would have sat here in a cloud of wonderment all day.

So, it stands to reason this dog’s name is Nia {nEYE uh}. According to BabyNameAddicts.com, the name means “purpose” and “bright”. She is purposeful like a librarian after preschool storytime and she is bright like the kid who sits in the front row of AP Physics.

For example, she’s already done this 56 times today:

On the other hand, BabyNameAddicts tells me Charlie means “manly” and she’s already done this for 56 minutes today:

I refuse to be the one to draw the correlation (at least directly) so if you’d like to, feel free to do so in the comments.

Say a tiny prayer for us. We’d hate to be the ones who left Timmy in the well because Nia was busy helping us find the remote control.

8 Replies to “Scooby Doo and the Super Collider”

  1. *snort*! holy canoli, Bobbi! I’m sitting here wanting so badly to comment in a way that continues the conversation, but all I can do is laugh out loud and thank God for the privilege. If you hadn’t put that link on there, I would never have known what a Poonurse was.

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